the greatest oxymoron.

I used to go to a church where we had communion every Sunday.  I didn’t understand why at first.  Then I worried that it would become rote, with a weekly occurrence robbing it of its sacredness.  But after a few months, my family and I embraced it.  It brought us closer as a family because there were always recent events that we needed to apologize to one another – instead of trying to wrack our brains once a month for stuff to say sorry for.

The same can be said for the Easter story – all of the events surrounding the crucifixion, the burial, and the resurrection.

If you’ve grown up in the church, you’ve heard this story.  A lot.  You’ve been to multiple services on Easter weekend, all touching on some aspect of the story, and maybe you’ve even been to Passion City Church’s Good Friday service with Louis Giglio (which, if you haven’t, is a must because it’s unparalleled).

Easter, in a sense, can also become rote – obvious and dull for all of us who have grown up listening to this story over and over since it’s so essential to the Gospel.  In the midst of meals with extended family members, egg hunts with small children, and making sure your outfit is finished by Easter morning, it can even be forgotten.  This same struggle happens around Christmastime, when the true meaning for all of the celebrations is pushed aside by the chaos and distractions.

This is true for me.  In the past, I’ve had to repent for focusing more on traveling to see family members than on Jesus’s precious gift to me.

That’s one thing I never want to lose sight of.  It’s the greatest oxymoron I’ve ever known – that by His wounds, He gave me healing.  I’ll never get over that.

But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on Him, and by His wounds we are healed.
Isaiah 53:5

This Easter, spend time with your family members and enjoy the egg hunt (it’s perfectly fine to be scared of the Easter bunny, though it’s too big why I don’t understand), but take the time to get alone with God.  Sit in your room or take a walk in the woods or drive on a random road in the mountains – whatever it takes to get rid of all of the distractions and outside chaos.  Think about what He did for you, and thank Him for it.  I know I’ll be doing it, because I’ve been awestruck by His grace and love – the love that saved my soul.

happy 100th birthday, bucky.

Today is my baby Bucky’s birthday.  More than that, it’s his 100th birthday.  (My little baby’s all grown up and eighty years older than me – *weeps*)

So I thought, what better way to spend it than get all feelsy over a fanvid?

Grab some tissues and a birthday cupcake and cry with me.

love week | some fanvids of my favorite ships.

Hello all!  Welcome to the week of Valentine’s Day, which usually finds me and my single friends eating chocolate and watching sappy movies.  (The same can probably be said of you, too, if you’re single – don’t even try to lie to me.)  This week, I’m going to be indulging in all things romantic, because even if I’m not in a relationship, I can at least enjoy the fictional people who are, right?

Literally just like the title says.  Warning: Probably spoilers.

focal point | sherlolly {sherlock}

I’ve been shipping this since Season One, guys.  And it was worth it.  It’s always been worth it.

the last time | literati {gilmore girls}

Y’all know I didn’t like Jess.  But then he grew on me after I wrote that post, and, by the time A Year in the Life came around, he was (imho) the best of the three for Rory.  So here I sit, still holding my opinion of angsty teenage Jess, but having an entirely new opinion of AYitL Jess.  (And yes of course I’m planning Literati fanfiction.)

this is for the lonely | peter + wendy {peter pan}

Yes, I do ship small children.

i should have saved you | mileven {stranger things}

I will never get over this video, just like I will never get over this ship.  I’ll be sobbing over it ’til Season Two premieres in October.  (And this is the saddest video in this bunch, so I’m sorry.)

this | tim + mary {about time}

Current favorite movie (About Time) and current favorite actor (Domhnall Gleeson).  I love this so much.

tenerife sea | mondler {f.r.i.e.n.d.s}

I sobbed after Chandler proposed to Monica and then sobbed all over again when I found this video.  They’re my absolute favorite ship from this show, and I love them both dearly.

it’s you and me forever | cory + shawn {boy meets world}

Now, I don’t ship these two (I’m a hardcore Copanga and Shawngela shipper), but I love their bromance, their friendship, and how they’re always there for one another.  I love the love they have for one another.  Period.

teenage dream | copanga {boy meets world}

THIS is my main Boy Meets World ship.  Literal goals.

saturn | steggy {captain america}

Now, I don’t know who the crap allowed this, but I know I love it.  So bittersweet.  It perfectly encapsulates their story.

please don’t say you love me | knighthouse {emma}

Okay so the thing I love about this video is that it’s not just Emma Approved – it’s all the favorites!  Clueless (hello, Paul Rudd), the ’09 version (practically perfect in every way), and that other version that people like for some reason.  Love it.

Well, this concludes Love Week, as I’ll be at a cabin in Tennessee for the rest of the weekend with some of my very bestest friends.  What are some of your favorite fanvids?  What did you think about Love Week as a whole?  (Because I do love feedback & knowing that you guys like what I blog about.)

happy, free, confused, & lonely in the best way.

22, baby.  it’s been a ride.  and i can literally say that everything in this song personally connects with me in one way or another.  figures.

here’s to another year of ditching the whole scene and ending up… okay, dreaming and sleeping.  and hoping everything will be alright.

{ps: i love taylor.  if you hate on taylor, i will hate on you and that’s just the way it’ll go.}

songs that make me happy.

We all have those days when you just feel like hiding under a rock and crying until you die.

I’m the worst at handling Those Days.  I get angry, snap at my siblings, and make poor choices.  But in the last few months, I’ve learned how to cope in a slightly healthier manner.

One way is to listen to music that makes me happy.  Music does wonders for my mood, sometimes helping it (and sometimes hindering it like when i started sobbing over a fanvid the other day but we won’t talk about that).  But mostly helping it.

Anyway, here are a few songs I listen to when I’m sad or just want to feel happier.

This is such a good song.  I discovered it when watching Easy A (which has just the bEST SOUNDTRACK OF EVER), and have since listened to it on repeat… repeatedly.  *wink*

I first found this song on a Verily article about kinda sad music that makes you feel kinda happy, and it was the only one on the list that I’d never heard.  I’ve since memorized the song… and the rest of the album.

I have literally no idea why this song makes me so happy.  Maybe it’s because I love Dodie’s cover of it, or maybe it’s because I wanna sing it to a guy someday… or maybe just because it’s happy.  I DUNNO.

I don’t even know why I like this song.  I forget about it every now and then, and when I remember it, it’s like remembering an old friend.

This is from {500} Days of Summer, which my friend Thea recommended to me a few years ago and I’ve been in love ever since.  (I also FRIKKIN LOVE Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s version in the movie.)

This song was on repeat while I studied for a hard test, and it made the super-long study sessions so much happier.  : )  And it’s even CUTER when you find out that they’re MARRIED and they wrote it FOR THEIR WEDDING.  GAH.

There are quite a few songs by Sleeping at Last that make me happy, and this is one of them.  (Plus it inspired a crucial part in my novel… *wink*)

This one sounds like a Disney song, which is why I like it so much.  There’s also a piano version, but this one’s my favorite because of the winds and strings.

This one’s from Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 (WHICH IS A GREAT MOVIE – DO NOT DISS THAT MOVIE), and I fell in love with it the second I heard it.  Just ignore what it’s about.  😛

This one’s just a classic.  (Also, I can play it on the uke.)

Gosh, I love this song.  It makes me wanna get up and dance!

Trying to put very few “romantic” songs on here because of obvious reasons, butttt… I love this one too much to not add it.  If you’ve seen About Time, watch this version.  (And then let me know because I seriously love that movie.)

This is the only song here with a bad word but love it too much to not include.

I love Taylor Swift.  No shame.  I may not agree with every decision she makes, but who agrees with every decision I make?  I have the utmost respect for her, and think she’s an incredible young woman.  And this is one of my favorite TSwift songs.

This is a newer favorite, but it always makes me want to jump around and dance (even though it’s about depression – “this one’s a contradiction because of how happy it sounds… but the lyrics are so down”).

Whelp.  That’s about it.  I’ve made a handy dandy playlist for you, if you want to listen to all of these but don’t want to keep coming back here to click on another video.  You’re welcome.

Have you heard any of these?  Any new ones?  What are some of your happy songs?

“should i stay or should i go now…” | stranger things.

stranger-things-poster(You know you’re a fan when this song makes you tear up.)

Before I start, here’s the obligatory disclaimer: This show has language.  Like crazy.  And little kids saying the words.  (Okay so they’re like twelve but I’ve adopted them because they’re all so cute.)  And there’s a sexy scene in one episode.  I love this show, but it’s got stuff in it, so don’t go off and watch it and then get mad at me for not notifying you of that fact.  (It’s happened.  I kid you not.  XD)  You have been warned.

(Also, this isn’t a review, it’s just a place for me to fangirl.)

Okay, so Stranger Things, if you haven’t heard of it, is the brainchild of two brothers, and it’s Netflix’s most recent (amazing) original series.  My family just got Netflix streaming, so we’re pretty new to it and haven’t seen the other shows, so I can’t say how this one compares but it’s pRETTY FREAKIN’ GOOD.  (I have very little desire to see Orange Is the New Black, so…  Netflix is where I watch Friends and Gilmore Girls.)

stranger-things1My sister and I had heard a lot about it, and after a friend recommended it, we decided to try it.  We watched the first episode in a dark, empty house, which heightened the experience significantly.

And, from that first episode, we were hooked.  We watched an episode or two every other night (after finishing our school and other responsibilities, obviously) and finished it in a week.

Not only is the plot amazing, it’s so original.  It’s like Stephen King + Stand By MeThe Goonies + Jaws + 80’s + sci-fi amazingness + everything Spielberg.  And it’s incredible.

But the characters are my favorite.

stranger-things-kids

lucas, dustin, mike, and eleven.  (aka my children)

First, you’ve got the kids – a group of literal twelve-year-olds, shoved into this incredibly adult situation when their best friend goes missing and crazy stuff starts happening.

Not gonna spoil much, but Dustin is hilarious, Lucas is so wise, Mike is just ALL AROUND AWESOME, and Eleven is precious.  (And Will’s great, too, but he’s only in like eight scenes.  But the scenes he’s in made me weep  – he’s SUCH A GOOD ACTOR.  {see his “should I stay or should I go” scene})

They’re all good good actors.  Gaten (Dustin) was in Les Miserables on Broadway before this, Noah (Will) was the voice of Charlie in the new Charlie Brown movie (and he’s also in a freaky Panic! at the Disco music video), and Millie (Eleven) is an amazing singer as well.  I expect great things from all of the actors, and if anyone hurts any them, I’ll hammer some nails into a baseball bat and hurt them right back.

Also, Mileven is L I F E, and I will ship it until the Upside Down rights itself.

Then you’ve got the older peoples.

stranger-things-trio

idiot steve, jonathan, and nancy

I love that a repeated line in the show is “You’re an idiot, Steve Harrington” because when my sister and I would say it, it was like we were quoting the show.  So it worked.  All you need to know about him is that he’s a jerk who can swing a baseball bat.  The end.

And Jonathan, aka my precious gumdrop, is too pure for words.  That scene when he apologized for that thing?  I was literally about to whisper to my sister, “If he apologizes, he is mine.”  And then he apologized.  ASDFGHJKL.  Too beautiful.  Too majestic.  My love. Ugh.  All the feels.

Nancy’s great, too.  Talk about character development.  (Minus the scene in front of the Christmas tree in the end – like, Nancy, have you not changed at all.)

Jancy is also life, and I knew from the second their eyes met across the cafeteria that it would happen.  (Except it didn’t.  So I’m still angry.  But it has Happening Potential.)

Then you’ve got the much older people.

hopper-joyce

sheriff jim hopper and jo march joyce byers

Jim Hopper’s such a deep character whose backstory we really don’t figure out ’til the last episode.  Plus, he’s that grumpy old teddy bear we can’t help but love and he’s jUST SO GREAT – and honestly if more child kidnapping searches were led by him, so many more kids would be found.

Also, Joyce.  Can we just talk about Joyce for a minute???  She’s been working at that awful job for, what, twelve years?  Never calling in sick, always picking up shifts for others, just to provide for her kids.  And she literally stops at nothing to find Will.  (And Winona is, as always, flawless.  The range of her acting in the different episodes of the show – and the flashbacks – is just phenomenal.

I love these two.  And, yes, I ship them so hard.  (This show has so many ships, guys.  SO. MANY. SHIPS.)

will-bathroom

A word of warning, though – it’s definitely freaky.  The scariest part is that they never show the audience the monster ’til the end, just teasing at it (much like the shark in Jaws). I personally think the build-up is freakier than the actual thing – the monster coming through the wall, anyone? – but it’s still scary.  (And, like I said before, there’s lots of language.)

So while I can’t recommend it without that disclaimer, I do still recommend it if you love sci-fi or well-written shows.  If you’ve seen it, what do you think?

bad boyz.

(whenever i think of bad boys, i think of this video.  CLASSIC STUDIO C!)

My sister and I have recently gotten into Gilmore Girls.  Mild obsession there, totally justified because it’s just SO. GOOD.  The dialogue is witty and quick, there isn’t a flimsy, undeveloped character in sight, and the story is amazing.  Not to mention the ships.  *clutches heart*  Luke&Lorelai forevahhhh.

If you aren’t familiar with it, the story follows Lorelai Gilmore and her daughter Rory and the ups and downs that go with growing up in a small town and trying to make their way in the world.  With that comes a series of boyfriends for both women, starting with Max for Lorelai and Dean my precious, angry ray of sunshine for Rory.  Everything goes fine for Dean and Rory – they love each other, they’re adorable, they help each other…

Then Jess Mariano comes in town.

jess1

He’s super smart and loves to read, but hates going to school.  In the first episode he’s in, he steals Rory’s book, writes notes in the margins, and gives it back.  He’s dashingly handsome and knows it, rebellious, hates living in Stars Hollow, and basically wants to be anywhere else but where he is – and grouchily lets everybody know it.

My sister – and the entire female population of the show’s viewers, apparently – immediately fell in love.  Understandably, too.  He’s had a super hard life, a rough childhood, and nobody seems to see past his “bad boy” facade and try to figure out who he really is underneath that.  (And my sister didn’t fall in love with him because he was hot, although it was a contributing factor.  She loved him because nobody else seemed to, because she wanted to see him succeed, and because she thought he had potential.  Completely understandable.)

I, on the other hand, didn’t like him.  I liked Dean.  Dean was precious and sweet and may have had some anger problems and was a little controlling, but there was so much LOVE between him and Rory!

If you’ve seen the show, you know what happens.  (And if you haven’t, here be spoilers.)  For some reason, Rory becomes infatuated with this kid.  Dean notices and gets ticked.  Rory tries to keep their relationship going, but she’s too distracted by the new kid.  Eventually, Dean gives up and breaks up with Rory, culminating in one of the most intense throw-downs of all TV history, second only to their massive fight at the end of the third season.  Rory and Jess immediately get together.  Because he doesn’t know how to communicate, they work together, but not as well as they could have.

jess and rory.jpg

To be completely honest, I still don’t really like Jess.  (WHY DOES HE HAVE TO BE SO CUTE, THOUGH?!)  I want him to be redeemed, but I can’t stand how rude he is to Rory.  My sister and I are at the end of the third season, and while I still don’t love him, he’s grown on me a little.  But STILL.  He’s gruff, rude, selfish, and does a lot of irresponsible things to get Rory’s attention.  My sister and I have had a lot of conversations about him and other bad boys.

There are so many of these “bad boy” characters on the screen today.  Shawn Hunter from Boy Meets World, Dean Winchester from Supernatural*, Moriarty from Sherlock, Jack Harkness from Doctor Who*, Jayne Cobb (and, to an extent, Malcolm Reynolds) from Firefly, Han Solo and Kylo Ren from the Star Wars franchise, Loki from the Marvel movies, half the guys from The Outsiders, and Draco Malfoy from Harry Potter.  (Starred are characters/shows that I’m aware of and know enough about, but don’t watch.  Just fyi.)

These bad boy characters are suave, always have problems with authority, have a devil-may-care attitude about everything, are kind of cocky or disrespectful, usually don’t treat ladies well, get into fights easily, are played by super hot actors, and typically wear leather.  (Does Draco wear leather?  I need to look into this.)

Girls typically swoon over them faster than the “good guys” on the show, or – like me – find themselves inexplicably drawn to this character, regardless of their initial hatred.  I’ve become deeply interested with the bad boy characters because they’re so interesting.  A few of my favorites are Shawn, Mal, and the boys from The Outsiders.  (If you’ve never liked a bad boy character, congratulations.  You’re a special snowflake.)

shawn hunter

So why are bad boys so entrancing?  All of the above characteristics should be immediate turn-offs… shouldn’t they?  Why do girls fall in love with them so quickly?

Well, let’s look at Rory’s situation.  Jess was mysterious.  He had a troubled past.  (They all do, don’t they…)  More than that, he needed her help.  At least, she thought he did.

My theory is that Rory and other female heroines who fall in love with these types of guys have some kind of Superman complex.  If only they could save this guy, he’d be such a catch!  And sometimes they don’t even go that far – he’s just so hot they can’t help but want to save him, regardless of what he does in return.  They pity him because of his troubled past or because “he’s just misunderstood” or because he’s just so smooth and hot and looks good lounging against a street sign when he should be in school.  A friend also suggested that they promise adventure.

kylo

Most of all, women were born with an innate desire to nurture, and sometimes we pick the worst off.  This leads me to always fall in love with and cheer on the underdog.  Show me a slightly pathetic, deserves-everything-yet-has-nothing character and I’ll keep him for forever.  Neville Longbottom, Shawn Hunter, Johnny Cade – those are the kinds of guys my mothering nature leads me to.  For others, that may mean the bad boy character.  If you can heal or help him, you will.

I personally think that the bad boys often have the most potential.  If they can get out of that bad situation, they’ll stop at nothing to keep themselves from going back.  I’ll take a redeemed bad boy over an unchanging good guy any day.

So what do you think?  Agree?  Disagree?  Do you fall for bad boys or do you prefer good guys?

v o t e. | video

frens.

this election is gonna be weird.  duh.  even if you’re not american, it’s gonna be weird.

we’re faced with two very different options, and i’m not liking either of them.  i’ve always hated the game ‘would you rather,’ and now the entire nation has to play it… including me.

i don’t know who i’m voting for, but i know i’m going to vote for someone.  let my fren john tell you why (and why you should too).